Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Carlyle Group's IPO: Beauty Pageant

Dealbook reported Wall Street's courting of The Carlyle Group's IPO.  It called the process a "beauty pageant."  Pageant preparation started with Carlyle dressing up "cases" for web consumption.  They omitted hedge fund failures BlueWave Partners and Carlyle Capital Corporation.  Also hidden, Carlyle's dark weight loss secret, purging affiliates for ginormous pre-IPO profits.

Wall Street banks lining up for Carlyle's business?  Now that brings back memories.  Carlyle co-founder David Rubenstein compared the deals to sex, citing how private equity underwriters (PEU's) were "unable to resist the temptation."

Who will get the edge and lead role in taking Carlyle public.  My guess:  It'll be the one wearing Scalina lingerie.  Is that Lloyd Blankfein or Jamie Dimon?

America's greed addicts run a never ending pageant, winning the world's most wealthy title.  In that light Carlyle added two hedge funds, Claren Road and a 55 percent stake in Tiger Management LLC-backed Emerging Sovereign Group LLC.  Let's hope they fare better than Carlyle's unpublished stories.

Update 6-17-11:  Jamie Dimon looked the best in Scalinas.  JPMorgan is expected to get the lead role, according to DealBook.